Many of these folks (the really extreme ones) are elitists and live in major cities like New York. They tell us that our "carbon footprint" is far too big. We live in the burbs and so have to drive a gas guzzling car to our jobs, our suburban houses are far too big as opposed to a more "sensible" apartment in the city (something about 3,000 sq ft on the upper East Side with servants quarters would be ever so wonderful), we fill those spacious homes with way too many kids (totally irresponsible from an environmental viewpoint) and of course, there are all of those cows in the burbs, farting methane (don't all of those non-city hicks own cows?).
Well, it turns out that major cities emit as much as 15 degrees more heat than the surrounding countryside. What can be done to eliminate this huge threat to our planet? If we don't do something now, these cities could cause a global meltdown of unprecedented proportions. You know; dead baby polar bears, 20 foot sea level rises, 2,000 species becoming extinct daily, refrigerators struggling to keep the champagne cold. Pretty serious stuff. Here is my personal call to action so that we can save the planet:
1. Keep all thermostats in city buildings set to 50 degrees in the winter and 110 degrees in the summer. This will keep cities cooler, reduce our dependence on foreign oil and reduce our carbon footprint.
2. Immediately begin a cap and trade system that will charge all city residents for carbon credits if they choose to ride a subway or heat their apartments.
3. Immediately earmark $2 trillion in federal funds (i.e.- your money) to provide fans (and cable TV, and computers and HD TV's) for the poor.
4. Consolidate space by partitioning all penthouses on the upper East and West sides of Manhattan into 1,000 sq ft modules so that we can immediately stop all carbon emitting construction. Let's get three or four families into every one of those high end apartments. This should in fact be done in every high density city in the US (we won't need to do this in China or India because they are "developing" and in the case of China, they hold a lot of our debt so it won't do to make them mad)
5. Immediately gag all professors in high end universities (Harvard, Columbia, etc.) as it has been proven that these people are the largest source of hot air on the planet.
6. Begin moving the population away from the cities and spread them out over the vast spaces in America. We'll reduce the Urban Heat Islands, reduce slums, reduce crime, improve education ... the list just goes on and on. We'll also put guys like Bloomberg out of a job, eliminating even more hot air.
7. Immediately take government control of all businesses within every city because ... well, just because the government likes to run private businesses.
If we all pull together, we can conquer the global warming beast and ... WAIT ... this news just in! There is no longer a Global Warming problem. It is Climate Change we need to worry about, so forget all of the stuff above.
Want to see an interesting video opinion of "Global Warming"? Read on.
Bob Lonsberry is a talk radio host with followings in Rochester, New York and Salt Lake City. He is outspoken and controversial but very often is right on target.
Take this link for a great opinion on "Global Warming".
What's your Carbon Footprint?
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